Vanessa's+2nd+essay

Vanessa Rodanas Mr. Bouton- F Composition January 26, 2009 **College Essay- Draft 1** Competitive nature has been intrinsic in me since the beginning, crafted out of my multidimensional national level competitions that created the person I am today. Growing up as the younger sister just behind my older brother instilled in me a need to reach for the bigger, better, best motto, propelling me forward in a number of venues. As young as six, when the first national opportunity presented itself, I practiced incessantly towards my goal of becoming the national competition of this unique competition. After competing in a local Wal-Mart competition for Nabisco’s Oreo stacking competition, I was contacted and informed I had qualified for the national level. I went on to become the national champion, winning a scholarship, a year’s supply of Oreo cookies, and endless lessons on sportsmanship and dedication. My thirst for becoming the best became endless after this first taste of realizing how hard work could pay off to reach greater means. I followed in my brother’s fisherman shoes and entered in the BASS Casting Kids organization, devoting myself to practicing the flip, pitch, and cast daily, working to my fullest extent until I moved on to be one of five national competitors. Unique talents did not run the extent of my national achievements, but the list also includes scholarly goals. PBS and Reading Rainbow hosted a competition to craft a story book, self illustrated and written, and I decided to take on the task. Careful penmanship and intricate drawings led to my 2nd place national victory, creating a base for my future writing passion and skills. More recently, I entered the Patriots Pen, youth competition equivalent to VFW, and placed top 10 nationally for my essay honoring the veterans. Reading my speech in front of hundreds of people helped me to gain self confidence in public speaking, giving me an audience that I aspire to be in front of once again. On the athletic level, I began fencing at age nine and started a passion that would never die out. Competing in two junior Olympics, multiple national level tournaments, and even securing a few national medals, has tied in my physical fitness with the mental and creative side of my brain. The balance achieved with fencing helps me to stay strong while calculating my moves against opponents more carefully than in other sports. Traveling to the various national tournament locations has given me a tour of the country and the various cultures, filling in gaps of areas my multiple family road trips have not already covered. I had to give up fencing temporarily during the beginning of my high school years due to wear on my knees and academic demands, but this opened new doors to experiment with other sports such as crew, tennis, and field hockey. I have even been able to test the musicals at school and sing in the concert choir. Boarding my horizons offered new experiences, but brought me right back home to fencing, which I have recently been able to take up again, fighting hard to gain back my old skill. Through education about competition and hard work at a young age, I have been able to apply my efforts to school work in the recent years, working to educate myself as fully as the school will allow. Well rounded education through music, sports, and academics have shaped me into a strong person that was crafted way back in my Oreo stacking days. My focus is more on community service and my Get Real charity organization during these days, but my unique talents and national drive are present as ever. The unique experiences that made me who I am make me the un-equalled individual I sought to be.


 * That's a very rough draft so far. I haven't even read it yet. So feel free to offer lots of suggestions. Don't hold back.**